Is it just me? Or do strangers say dumb things to you too? I don’t think most people are trying to be rude- they just must not think before they say things. I usually let things run off my shoulders pretty easily, or I’ll tell Joe later and be like wasn’t that so dumb that they said that?!… and then get over it. I really don’t get my feelings hurt easily, but I keep getting these same comments over and over lately and I just need to put it out there...so I can get over it. Haha
We were at Joe’s work dinner last night and the conversation led to skiing. I was talking about how Joe has been dying for me to learn to ski for a while, but I’m always pregnant or have just had a baby so haven’t been able to learn yet. This girl that I had never met interrupts me from clear across the table, “Wait... you’ve been pregnant multiple times?” To which I just responded with, “Yeah, I had our 3 kids in just under 4 years.” She looked at me like I was thee craziest person and rudely says, “I’m sorry.” I was so taken back that this random girl I had just met, would say that. Just, "I'm sorry." I didn’t know how to respond and can’t even remember what I said, but after that I just sat quietly crunching my croutons, feeling baffled.
Maybe I am being sensitive and maybe my wanting to punch her in the face wasn't justified, but I have gotten so many comments like this lately and they just rub me the wrong way.
Maybe I am being sensitive and maybe my wanting to punch her in the face wasn't justified, but I have gotten so many comments like this lately and they just rub me the wrong way.
Yes, I did have kids quickly. Yes, I am still young. Yes, I have probably had to grow up much faster than most people my age. It was not my plan to have 3 kids by 25. No, I am not sorry. No, you should not be "sorry" either. Most people must not understand that this has always been my dream. Others pursue traveling, adventures, careers or whatever, and that is so great! Maybe it’s not as picture perfect or as easy as I may have thought, but being a mom is what I prepared my whole life for.
A few years ago, when Hayes was a baby and I was only 21, I was having a hard time not having things to find self-esteem in. I was used to sports and dancing and academics and friends, and all of the sudden, I was just home all day in a quiet house with a baby. I didn’t stay in close contact with many of my college friends, Joe was gone to work all day, and it was just me trying to figure out how to take care of a baby. I watched my friends, most of whom were not even married yet, going out and doing fun things and activities and it was kind of tough for me. I started questioning if I had jumped aboard the grown-up train too fast. But, one day I was struck with the thought- why am I feeling sorry for myself? Isn’t this what I always dreamed of? So what if it’s not always that dreamy! It is my calling, and I know it. I made a goal that day to be the best mother I could be. That is where I was going to put all of my efforts into and that’s where I would draw my esteem. My home. My family. My kids. Seem silly? Maybe. But, it worked. I have 3 perfectly healthy, and ever so sweet little boys. Seriously, they are such good kids. I have never found more joy or found such hard work to be so fulfilling. You’ll hear me jokingly complain about how crazy my life is, but we’re slowly adjusting and I am so, so grateful that life has found me here, at such a young age, with so much to be grateful for.
So, to the stranger who is feeling sorry for me across the table- don't. I dreamed of this chaos ;)
Thought I'd add some cuteness of our night looking at Christmas lights, visiting Santa's reindeer, and warming up with hot cocoa. I love these fellas!
